Well, That Was An Expensive Lesson (but worth it)

My 5 Week Turnaround Moving Out of the Country (and back)

There’s nothing like a major life decision to gain some much-needed clarity… even if it costs you a lot of time, energy, and money.

That’s one of the bonuses of hitting mid-life.

You learn to roll with situations that have you saying, “It is what it is.”

In this case, I’m talking about my recent move back to Costa Rica (the most hellacious travel experience I’ve ever had) only to get down there (in the same place I lived before) and realize I didn’t want to be there.

I had decided to move back to Costa Rica in January of this year (having lived there from June of 2021- February of 2023) and had been looking forward to it all year. I was able to get my same place back with a deposit, and the landlord held it until July for me (however, had he been able to rent it, I don’t think he would have held it).

I waited to move until August to be here for my Dad’s 80th birthday.

The hellacious journey was with my dog and an incorrect health certificate from the vet in California. We were sent back to LA twice in one week.

After the second trip back, we returned to Northern California for two weeks to regroup and get a new health certificate from a different vet.

Before I explain the expensive lesson and why it was worth it, I want to share an invaluable little side story.

I knew before I got back to Northern California that I was going to hold the vet who screwed up the health certificate accountable for my costs (for what it’s worth, Alaska was great about everything and covered all the flights).

In addition to all the travel expenses and the cost of the new health certificate, I told them I expected them to cover the rent for the apartment I wasn’t using for most of August.

A few friends stated they weren’t sure about asking for the rent to be covered. 🤯

A couple of things to note here:

• I wasn’t “asking” for anything. I was very clear that I expected to be reimbursed (I wrote a brilliant letter if I do say so myself; a little help from ChatGPT goes a long way).

• Women are conditioned to not ask for (or expect) what they want/deserve. Settling for less, not asking for what we want, not being direct, and wanting to make it easier for someone else (can you imagine flying to and from Costa Rica in 3 days with a dog who spent way too much time in a kennel, then delaying a move for an additional two weeks and not asking to be reimbursed?!).

I felt like I was being more than fair, asking only to be reimbursed for out-of-pocket expenses (and even then, I forgot a couple of items; oh well). That experience was traumatic.

Had I not sent my luggage to my place with the driver who came to pick me up (I knew him), the thought had crossed my mind about not going at all.

But I felt like that was because I was in such a raw place and didn’t want to make a reactive decision.

Within my first week back, I started to have doubts.

Everything felt different.

There was this little voice inside that was saying, “You don’t have to stay.”

When I chatted with a friend a few weeks later about my decision to leave, she said something that summarized my reasons for moving back to California.

“You’re a different person than the one who moved down to Costa Rica in 2021.”

Preach sister. 😉

In the five weeks I was in Costa Rica (I still love the country and will be visiting friends there), I had a lot of time to reflect on my business and life.

Besides the pivot in my business (this newsletter and upcoming podcast are part of that pivot), one of my priorities this year was to create more ease in my life. I don’t have a lot of extraneous “stuff” in my life (some people would call me a minimalist), and I want my business to feel the same.

I’m letting go of tools (subscriptions) and platforms that no longer serve me or don’t enjoy.

I had been leaning toward these things, but for whatever reason, I didn’t pull the trigger.

My journey to Costa Rica and back was exactly what I needed to get crystal clear about a handful of things.

Was it an expensive lesson?

Absolutely… but totally worth it (which is much easier to say after the fact 😉).

Sometimes, the “cost” of things isn’t just about the dollars and cents.

It’s about who we become in the process.

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Women You Should Know

Credit: The History Page

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Money Moves

I upgraded my phone this past May, and while doing the data transfer at the T-Mobile store, I chatted with the employees.

They very delicately asked me how old I was (54) and told me to make sure that as soon as I turn 55, I’m eligible for a discount on my cell phone plan!

Most of us know that there are senior discounts for things, but I never would have thought that a cell phone plan would be one of those things (maybe because, in my head, I’m still about 38 😜).

Check with your carrier to see what discounts are available.

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Resources

Money App: I’ve been using Rocket Money for a while and love it. I originally signed up to track and manage subscriptions, but it does so much more. Check out Rocket Money here.

Book: I read this book this past summer after finding the author’s website and being moved by her TED talk (she talks about the story from her TED talk in her book). As a money coach (after experiencing her fair share of money challenges), she has a unique way of working through money issues and shares many client stories. It’s inspiring and a great reminder about letting go of shame and judgment. Check out Money Detox here.

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A favorite quote from a movie I adore…

“My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being normal is not necessarily a virtue? It rather denotes a lack of courage.”

- Aunt Frances (Stockard Channing), Practical Magic

Author, Alice Hoffman

*Side note: They’re making a sequel with Sandra Bullock & Nicole Kidman!

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You may (or may not) have noticed that I wasn’t in your inbox last week.

I was in the throws of packing, selling stuff, and then moving back to California.

I don’t make it a habit of not sending my newsletter at the regularly scheduled time (my other newsletter has 203 issues - never missed one!), but sometimes, we can all use a little grace.

So that’s what I gave myself last week.

And it’s paid off.

I’m settled, 100% confident in my decision, and back on a regular schedule.

Have a wonderful day!
Kim