We Can't Do This Alone - The Collective Power of Women's Financial Liberation

On talking circles, Gloria Steinem, and the feminine mastery of money

Growing up, I never once thought that my Dad “controlled” the money.

I always thought of my parents as a team - and when I got older, I thought of them as a well-oiled machine.

But I remember my Mom commenting about their cars always being in my Dad’s name (it was clear that it annoyed her)… and I didn’t get it.

Until I did.

I don’t think that was as conscious of a decision as it was a statement about their generation (baby boomers).

The older I get, the more I see things like this for what they are (I wish I could say for what they ‘were’—but here we are), which makes me angry.

I’ll be honest (not like I’ve been lying up until now, lol)… the closer we get to the inauguration, the more in disbelief I am, and my anger gets reignited.

This is why I’ve gone down a rabbit hole listening and reading Gloria Steinem.

This past weekend, I was in the car for a couple of hours and found a live talk she gave in 1993: “On Self-Esteem and Scholars, Witches, and Other Freedom Fighters.”

Her brilliance and wisdom instantly anchor me.

I felt inspired, empowered, and smarter… all from one two-hour talk (with Q&A at the end).

She speaks with such calm conviction and commitment… I’m in awe.

There are so, so many juicy nuggets from this audio, but I want to focus on something that applies to Every.Single.Woman.

We can’t do this alone.

And by “this,” I mean whatever “it” is you must do.

Gloria has been a proponent of “talking circles” for at least 50 years (the wisdom & power of a talking circle has been around for centuries):

Source: First Nations Pedagogy

My “this” is the feminine mastery of money.

Do I know what that looks like?

Not yet, but I’m getting closer daily and am in this for the long haul. It’s a process, not an event.

For too long, I’ve carried shame about not knowing more or doing better with money.

But here's the thing about financial education that no one tells us: the shame we feel about not knowing?

That's not ours to carry.

That shame belongs to a system that deliberately kept financial knowledge from women for generations.

Think about it.

Our mothers, grandmothers, and aunts couldn't even get a credit card in their name until 1973. They weren't allowed to get mortgages without a male cosigner, and they weren't "allowed" to access, let alone master, financial education.

And while those legal barriers have fallen, the psychological ones?

They're still standing tall (and reinforced by multiple societal systems).

This is why the decision to pursue my Master's in Financial Planning and Financial Psychology feels so significant. It's not just about gaining knowledge—it's about breaking a cycle.

But here's what's really fascinating...

The more I dive into this work, the more I realize that mastering money isn't just about understanding compound interest or investment strategies (though those are important).

It's about reclaiming our right to be powerful with money.

Gloria Steinem is right - we can't do this alone.

Whether dismantling patriarchy or mastering our finances, we need each other.

We need spaces where we can:

• Ask questions without shame

• Share our money stories without judgment

• Learn from each other's experiences

• Challenge inherited beliefs that no longer serve us

This is why I'm so passionate about creating these conversations. Because every time one woman steps into her financial power, she creates permission for others to do the same.

Think about it: How many of us have subtle money messages we've inherited?

Like my Mom's frustration about the cars being in my Dad's name, at the time, I didn't get it.

Now? That small detail speaks volumes about the financial dynamics of their generation.

And while my parents operated as a team, these subtle inequities weren't conscious decisions - they were just "how things were done."

But here's what gives me hope: We get to decide how things are done now.

We get to:

• Question the systems that weren't built for us

• Create new models of financial empowerment

• Support each other's growth and learning

• Pass on different messages to the next generation

I’ve officially started my Master’s program, and as excited as I am, there’s also a little discomfort. I’m more interested in the psychology side of things than the finance, but that’s more from a place of this being new than disinterest.

I also feel a sense of responsibility.

Because this isn't just about my own learning - it's about being part of a bigger movement.

One thing I do know about the feminine mastery of money is that it’s about women supporting women.

The feminine mastery of money involves asking questions without apology, claiming our right to understand, grow, and, yes, even enjoy our relationship with money.

Financial education isn't just about learning—it's an act of rebellion against a system that never wanted us to know our own power.

And that's precisely why we need to do it.

Together. 🫶

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Women You Should Know

Gloria Steinem

(It felt like it made sense to highlight her this week, not that she needs much of an introduction.)

"The truth will set you free. But first, it will piss you off."

- Gloria Steinem

Gloria Steinem, a feminist icon for over 60 years, continues to inspire with her activism at 94. One story that highlights her focus on women and money is the founding of Ms. Magazine in 1971. Despite their successful journalism careers, she and her co-founders couldn’t secure a credit card or bank loan without male cosigners. This experience deepened her belief that economic independence is key to women’s liberation. She wisely notes, "Women won’t be equal outside the home until men are equal inside the home," including in financial decisions.

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Money Moves

Speaking of financial decisions, let's discuss something practical that also honors our right to take up space: negotiation.

Here's a tip I wish I'd known years ago: When negotiating anything financial (salary, car price, home repair), don't feel pressured to fill the silence. State your position clearly, then wait. Often, we rush to fill uncomfortable silences with justifications or concessions.

Try this instead:

1. State your position clearly

2. Stop talking

3. Wait

4. If they counter, pause before responding

5. Remember: You have the right to advocate for yourself

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Resources

Book: "Moving Beyond Words" by Gloria Steinem. This collection of essays includes "Sex, Lies, and Advertising," in which she details the fascinating (and frustrating) story of launching Ms. Magazine and the financial barriers women faced.

Listen: "On Self-Esteem and Scholars, Witches and Other Freedom Fighters." This 1993 talk, which I mentioned earlier, is pure gold. Gloria's calm conviction about women's power and potential is what we need right now.

Tool: Qube Money App - Bringing the cash envelope system to the digital age. Take control of your finances with Qube Money (I haven’t tried this, so let me know what you think if you do!).

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Sending love to all in California 😢

Image source: Unknown

As a California native (Bay Area), I am heartbroken by the devastation and loss so many are experiencing. For facts about what is actually happening, visit California Fire Facts.

The fact that these fires have been politicized speaks volumes about the degree of ignorance in the US. 😢

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"We need to remember across generations that there is as much to learn as there is to teach."

-Gloria Steinem

This quote feels especially meaningful as I begin this next chapter in my education journey. We're all teachers and students on this journey toward financial empowerment.

Here's to learning, growing, and taking up space - together.

Have a wonderful week,

Kim

P.S. If you have a story about a time you advocated for yourself financially, I'd love to hear it! Just hit reply or leave a comment below. 🌟